Friday, 18 January 2008

Nine Dangerous Words Women Use

1.) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with Nothing usually end in Fine.

4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

5.) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about Nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of Nothing.)

6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's Okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7.) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome .

8.) Whatever : Is a women's way of saying SCREW YOU! -

9.) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement,later meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will result in a man asking "What's wrong ?" For the woman's response refer to #3.

  • Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.
  • Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, they know it's true.

Thursday, 17 January 2008

PETA Sex Talk

Why men have better friends

Friendship between women: A woman didn't come home one night. The next

morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's

house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew

anything about it.


Friendship between men: A man didn't come home one night. The next

morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The

woman called her husband's 10 best friends, 8 of which confirmed that he

had slept over, and 2 said that he was still there.

Tuesday, 8 January 2008

THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD

HOPE THIS MAKES YOU SMILE -- Well, it's shit ... that's right, shit! Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language. You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, And tell others to eat shit. Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference Between shit and shineola. There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken shit. You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan. You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle. You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit. Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, And some days are just plain shitty. Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit. You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit. You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle. Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose. So When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language. And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!! You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't give a shit! Well, Shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you happened to catch a load of shit from some shit-head........... Well, Shit Happens!!! I HOPE YOUR SHITTY DAYS ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN..

Monday, 7 January 2008

DTV Transition and the Coupon Program


What is the TV Converter Box Coupon Program?

Congress created the TV Converter Box Coupon Program for households wishing to keep using their analog TV sets after February 17, 2009. The Program allows U.S. households to obtain up to two coupons, each worth $40, that can be applied toward the cost of eligible converter boxes.

A TV connected to cable, satellite or other pay TV service does not require a TV converter box from this program.

Consumers have a variety of options. Options to explore include:
  1. Keep your existing analog TV and purchase a TV converter box. A converter box plugs into your TV and will keep it working after Feb. 17, 2009, or
  2. Connect to cable, satellite or other pay service, or
  3. Purchase a television with a digital tuner.

Get you coupon here